Maybe I Should Be Laughing More

Arthur Rimbaud at the age of seventeen by Étie...

Maybe it is not a funny Joke?

Life’s the joke each of us keeps on playing.”

Arthur Rimbaud,  “A Season in Hell

Lately, I have been thinking a lot about how I move through my life. Little by little, as I age, I move into a world that is alien to Me. As I move into uncomfortable territory I construct screens like billboards along the highway of my life that keep me from seeing the changes. I decorate these screens with things as I think they should be, not only covering the fact that death is inevitable, but also that I may outlive or drive away everyone who knows and loves me and be left in a tragic state of lonely darkness.

 

Here are some questions I have been wrestling with in hopes of  avoiding this outcome:

 

  1. Is it possible to change, and when, if ever, is it too late?
  2. How do I stay in the light?
  3. Is the darkness bad?
  4. What the hell is out there, and is it worse than what I have now?
  5. Are these the right questions?
  6. Why do we make each other miserable when we are all in mostly the  same position, and are not really improving our own condition by doing so?

 

I am sure I do things that make people miserable without any gain to myself. In fact I make myself miserable sometimes. I don’t want to do it. It just happens when I say and do things without thinking of the consequences, or simply add to the current load of misery by not paying attention.

Am I adding to the misery of others by posting this?

I hope not, but what can I do? I am only human.

This entry was posted in All part of the process, can't really complain but, change, lists, make your own world, mindworks, Other peoples words, paying attention, philosophy, Questions and riddles, thinking in words, visions from the dark side, whereever you go there you are and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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