5/13

There are rules and algorithms to operating in social life effectively. These rules have often been a mystery to me. Luckily I am intelligent and non-violent and have never had any uncontrollable urges to engage publicly in activities considered taboo. I am not a fighter, a gambler, or prone to lengthy obsessions. My obsessions come and go like tides or direction of the wind. One week I will be obsessed with a certain type of mint gum and the next month it will be dark beer and chocolate.

6/15

For the last year I have been lazy in my attitude toward my life. I have worked hard and done what needed doing when it had to be done. I have been busy with many projects, but I have been going through the motions on much of it relying on other people to take an interest in my life.

I do the best things when I am responding to ideas, not waiting for opportune moments.

7/13

Dream:

I am trying to fix my Toyota van in the parking lot of a upper class condominium complex. Some rich guys come out and are giving me a hard time.

“You should take it to the dealer,” one says trying to move me on my way.

“It’s an ’86, and I bought it from an old man,” I reply.

Another guy starts spraying down the parking lot accusing me of leaving a mess. The water gets on my new work suit. I notice he is wearing the same suit. I know that he can afford to buy another, while it cost me much of a month’s salary.

Finally I pick up the van and twist a nob on the roof. Each time I twist it the van grows smaller until I can fit it into my pocket and walk away.